Interesting inconsistency

 I've read a couple of reviews of Fifty Shades of Gray. I'm not planning to read the book -- I don't write or read porno or erotica -- but reviews can sometimes be instructive.

Wikipedia's entry has this: "The New Zealand Herald stated ... if you "can suspend your disbelief and your desire to – if you'll pardon the expression – slap the heroine for having so little self respect, you might enjoy it." A reviewer at Good Reads makes a similar observation..."Ana is just a giant mess of a human being. She's insecure to the point of it being laughable..."

So a woman who has little self-respect, or at least who is insecure, particularly about men -- why is that off-limits in romance fiction, but "damaged heroes" are all the rage?